The Red Beneath

It's a cold, unwelcome sickness
Impressing itself on me
The onset of psychosis
Triggered by memories
Suppression left me empty
Lest the tide should fill the void
They'll crawl back in and haunt me
Unless I can stop the noise

Curse the name by which this brain has been made
Its ill perfection refuses to let the past fade
In black and white I hear her voice
In screaming color I see her face
Why must I remember
Come forth, my resting place!

How I long to swallow silt and muck
To embrace this agony whither I am constrained
One inhale should send me into death
But I can't awaken from this mental drain

Fight, man! Fight this blasphemous reminiscence!
Your end is sealed! No reason to recall
The blood that stained your hands toward this disposition
But that thought awaits below as you fall