Old Country Doctor (The Ballad of Bones)

Well, they call me Bones and I'm tried in command
Second in line is man I just can't stand
He's a green blooded, pointy-eared, seven year itch
And when he pon farrs
He'll try to make me his bitch
Well, I may or may not have divorced my wife
But I damn sure pulled the plug on my daddy's life
And two months later, well, they found a cure
I'm just an old country doctor on a damned five year tour
The damned teleporter
Yeah, it gives me the creeps
The first time I used it
I couldn't get it up for weeks
Now my tricorder's busted
And sick bay just stinks
I guess I'll just go replicate me a drink
Well, I may or may not have divorced my wife
But I damn sure pulled the plug on my daddy's life
And two months later, well, they found a cure
I'm just an old country doctor on a damned five year tour
Well, Jim is the captain of this here ship
We call her the Enterprise, and the crew's pretty hip
Yeah, the girls all wear go-go boots and miniskirts
And I spend my days patching all the red shirts
Well, I have been asked to do many a think
Outside the area of my expertise
Damn it Jim, I know I've told you before
Damn it Jim, I know I've told you before
Damn it Jim, damn it Jim, I told you before
I'm just an old country doctor on a damned five year tour
Just an old country doctor on a damned five year tour