Not Funny Didn't Laugh

And I mean, what's the deal with airline food, am I right?
Like, one bite of that stuff and suddenly I get where terrorists are coming from
Like, lemme in there with ya we gotta take this plane down
No?
Nobody?
Sheesh, tough crowd

The inside jokes that I have with just myself
Are some of the funniest jokes I've ever told
But after not so long the sound of your own narcissistic laugh
Gets really, really old

I miss the way you'd groan and say
"How funny"
Your sarcasm soothes my soul like
Milk and honey

Okay, so this one's really funny
She says, "Knock, knock"
And I say, "Who's there?"
And she says, "I think we should see other people"
And I say, "I think we should see other people who?"
And she says, "Joshua, I am sleeping with your bassist"

The purple crocodiles in my dreams think I'm cute
But in a cute-enough-to-eat-you kinda way
And neither my therapist nor I knows exactly what it means
That I never seem to try to run away

Oh Doc, please promise me you'll
Do no harm
Just pinch me til I wake up
In her arms

What do you call an absent father who left your mother years ago?
It doesn't matter cuz he's still not gonna answer
My girlfriend doing chemo was a bitch to me today
She said, "Sorry babe, but you know that I'm a cancer"

I miss the way you'd groan and say
"How funny" (no, that was like, sooooo funny)
Your sarcasm soothes my soul like
Milk and honey (I promise I'm laughing on the inside)
Oh Doc, please promise me you'll
Do no harm (baby, don't hurt me no more)
Just pinch me til I wake up
In her arms