Recap Raps: Game of Thrones
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๐ ID: 13621589
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Yeah! This is Recap Raps!
We're gonna get you all caught up on
Game Of Thrones before the final seasons!
Pay real close attention, ya'll! Cause here we go!
Welcome to Winterfell. Royal fam on vacation,
Jaime (and) Cersei caught bangin' by Bran, defenestration,
Robert has an offer, Ned accepts the call,
Ned and daughters to the capital, Jon to the wall.
Dany has a douche bro, marries her to Drogo,
Almost a no-go, ride him like a pogo,
Rolling with Dothraki, hot queen dealing cold blows,
Call her Khaleesi, Now here's your Crown of Gold, bro.
Tyrion travels and gets it on,
Romances Shae, bromances Bronn,
Starks vs. Lannisters, Robb gets strategic,
Jaime is defeated, Ned learns a dirty secret.
Robert dies, Joffrey's king, Ned wants out of that scene,
His daughter's on the audience, he get Sean Bean-ed,
Drogo dies too, Dany struts into his pyre,
And emerges with her dragons, unaffected by the fire.
The North remembers, Catelyn tries to grow The Stark Brand,
Offers an alliance with King Renly and Queen-HOT DAMN!
Also Melisandre, what a fine magic lady,
She gets it on with Stannis to produce a Stabbing Smoke Baby!
Flee to Robb,
Only so that later Catelyn can release Jaime to make Team Oathslayer,
Arya haircut, meets a faceless badass,
Sansa phsychologically abused by King Asshat.
Theon in the North proves he's already dickless,
Jon leaves the wall on a quest to get his dick wet,
Stannis vs Lannisters, Blackwater, Green Fire,
Asshat pees himself, Tyrion inspires.
Meanwhile, Dany double-crossed in Qarth,
WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS?!? *small dragons roars* There they are,
So many stories, man, i'll die before i'm through this,
But it's like they say... "Valar Morghulis".
Oh yeah, beyond the wall,
White Walkers roam,
They should focus on that,
Forget the Throne.
Yeah, but they won't. Not as long as Asshat's on it,
Crossbowing Hookers? Dear God, can i be honest?
He's the biggest f*cking asshole i've ever f*cking seen,
I PUNCH MY TV EVERY TIME HE COMES ON-*punches
Tv*-SCREEN! *weird noises on tv* I'm chill... i'm chill...
Team Oathslayer, getting closer on the surface,
But, Jaime misses Cersei and now, he can't jerk it,
Bran and Hodor join forces when it starts to drizzle,
As for Theon dickless? Ramsay makes it official.
Jon and Ygritte cave action, Wilding on Crow,
Says he's gotta go, but... You know nothing, Jon Snow.
Dany frees slaves, gets her army at its largest,
Keep Jorah at bay, Opts for Daario Naharis.
Robb finds love in a gorgeous medic,
He puts a baby in her, they attend a wedding,
A song starts playing and The Starks starts dying,
I can't watch this again, i'm already crying.
Margaery and Asshat wedding with a purple twist,
Poison wine! Asshat dies like a SIMPLE BITCH!,
Blame it on Tyrion, who's like "What the hell, dad?",
Tywin's like "Eeh" and Jaime feels real bad.
Arya and The Hound, new bros stabbin' dudes,
Then The Hound goes down, Arya leaves him. Psh, rude.
Bran and Crew trudging, barely make it to the trees,
And find the Three-Eyed Raven, then they chill for a season.
Jon and Stannis teaming up, Wildlings ice-climb,
Jon and Ygritte tearing up, but she goes down this time,
Dany in Meereen with her new bearded Daario,
Dragons get homicidal, chain 'em up! Sorry, bro.
Can't forget Oberyn, so talented with sticks,
Goes to bat for Tyrion, but gets his face squished,
Jaime frees Tyrion, revenge for the latter,
He chokes out Shae, kills his daddy on the crapper
That's cool and everything,
White Walkers though (They're gonna kill you all)
Ramp up Valyrian Steel Production
Or else, you're boned
Yeah, no one cares. In fact, no one's mind could be further,
They're dealing with a cult and couple child murders,
Feel bad for Jaime, but for Stannis not so much,
He fails an invasion and slain by a woman's touch.
Tyrion escaping, meets Jorah on a bad night,
Tyrion promoted, stoned Jorah only gets iced,
"I'm gonna break the wheel." But, her reign is coming undone,
Deep shit, in the pits, EAT DRAGON FIRE, SONS!
Arya going faceless, but only gets cataracts,
Sansa pasychologically abused by a psychopath,
Sparrows in the capital, Cersei's in the new game,
Torture and Confession and- *bell rings 2 times* shame.
Jon and The Watch ally with The Wildings,
Hardhome Massacre, The Dead keep rising,
Jon's like, "Holy shit!" Thorne's like, "Up your's, bro.",
Stabby, stabby, stabby, that's the end of Jon Snow- or is it?
Melisandre playing doctor,
Let's see that ass again... OH GOD! She got hotter,
Bran escapes The Walkers, learns of Jon Snow's Lore,
Thanks to our friend who only lived to hold the door (Hodor!).
Dany and Dothraki, false start but they're back so...
Them, plus a fleet, plus her dragons, Dany's stacked, bro,
Arya ends her training, gets vengeance with a throat slash,
Jon and Sansa reunite, but gotta kill the psychopath.
The biggest f*cking asshole i've ever f*cking seen,
I PUNCH MY TV EVERY TIME HE- oh, i did that already,
Battle of The Bastards, visceral and vicious,
Jon wins, psychopath DIES VIA BITCHES!
King's Landing at The Mercy of Religion,
Young Tommen and Margaery try to reason with them,
Cersei's Trial, wildfire tears through the underground,
Tommen drops out, Queen Cersei Now. Bow down.
We know stuff was left out
Throw us a bone (There's so much crap to know)
But, you're set for the end
Of Game of Thrones
That was Game of Thrones Season 1 through 6, ya'll!
And this is Recap Raps!
Leave a comment below letting us what you want
To see next and we'll see you real soon! Dracarys!
We're gonna get you all caught up on
Game Of Thrones before the final seasons!
Pay real close attention, ya'll! Cause here we go!
Welcome to Winterfell. Royal fam on vacation,
Jaime (and) Cersei caught bangin' by Bran, defenestration,
Robert has an offer, Ned accepts the call,
Ned and daughters to the capital, Jon to the wall.
Dany has a douche bro, marries her to Drogo,
Almost a no-go, ride him like a pogo,
Rolling with Dothraki, hot queen dealing cold blows,
Call her Khaleesi, Now here's your Crown of Gold, bro.
Tyrion travels and gets it on,
Romances Shae, bromances Bronn,
Starks vs. Lannisters, Robb gets strategic,
Jaime is defeated, Ned learns a dirty secret.
Robert dies, Joffrey's king, Ned wants out of that scene,
His daughter's on the audience, he get Sean Bean-ed,
Drogo dies too, Dany struts into his pyre,
And emerges with her dragons, unaffected by the fire.
The North remembers, Catelyn tries to grow The Stark Brand,
Offers an alliance with King Renly and Queen-HOT DAMN!
Also Melisandre, what a fine magic lady,
She gets it on with Stannis to produce a Stabbing Smoke Baby!
Flee to Robb,
Only so that later Catelyn can release Jaime to make Team Oathslayer,
Arya haircut, meets a faceless badass,
Sansa phsychologically abused by King Asshat.
Theon in the North proves he's already dickless,
Jon leaves the wall on a quest to get his dick wet,
Stannis vs Lannisters, Blackwater, Green Fire,
Asshat pees himself, Tyrion inspires.
Meanwhile, Dany double-crossed in Qarth,
WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS?!? *small dragons roars* There they are,
So many stories, man, i'll die before i'm through this,
But it's like they say... "Valar Morghulis".
Oh yeah, beyond the wall,
White Walkers roam,
They should focus on that,
Forget the Throne.
Yeah, but they won't. Not as long as Asshat's on it,
Crossbowing Hookers? Dear God, can i be honest?
He's the biggest f*cking asshole i've ever f*cking seen,
I PUNCH MY TV EVERY TIME HE COMES ON-*punches
Tv*-SCREEN! *weird noises on tv* I'm chill... i'm chill...
Team Oathslayer, getting closer on the surface,
But, Jaime misses Cersei and now, he can't jerk it,
Bran and Hodor join forces when it starts to drizzle,
As for Theon dickless? Ramsay makes it official.
Jon and Ygritte cave action, Wilding on Crow,
Says he's gotta go, but... You know nothing, Jon Snow.
Dany frees slaves, gets her army at its largest,
Keep Jorah at bay, Opts for Daario Naharis.
Robb finds love in a gorgeous medic,
He puts a baby in her, they attend a wedding,
A song starts playing and The Starks starts dying,
I can't watch this again, i'm already crying.
Margaery and Asshat wedding with a purple twist,
Poison wine! Asshat dies like a SIMPLE BITCH!,
Blame it on Tyrion, who's like "What the hell, dad?",
Tywin's like "Eeh" and Jaime feels real bad.
Arya and The Hound, new bros stabbin' dudes,
Then The Hound goes down, Arya leaves him. Psh, rude.
Bran and Crew trudging, barely make it to the trees,
And find the Three-Eyed Raven, then they chill for a season.
Jon and Stannis teaming up, Wildlings ice-climb,
Jon and Ygritte tearing up, but she goes down this time,
Dany in Meereen with her new bearded Daario,
Dragons get homicidal, chain 'em up! Sorry, bro.
Can't forget Oberyn, so talented with sticks,
Goes to bat for Tyrion, but gets his face squished,
Jaime frees Tyrion, revenge for the latter,
He chokes out Shae, kills his daddy on the crapper
That's cool and everything,
White Walkers though (They're gonna kill you all)
Ramp up Valyrian Steel Production
Or else, you're boned
Yeah, no one cares. In fact, no one's mind could be further,
They're dealing with a cult and couple child murders,
Feel bad for Jaime, but for Stannis not so much,
He fails an invasion and slain by a woman's touch.
Tyrion escaping, meets Jorah on a bad night,
Tyrion promoted, stoned Jorah only gets iced,
"I'm gonna break the wheel." But, her reign is coming undone,
Deep shit, in the pits, EAT DRAGON FIRE, SONS!
Arya going faceless, but only gets cataracts,
Sansa pasychologically abused by a psychopath,
Sparrows in the capital, Cersei's in the new game,
Torture and Confession and- *bell rings 2 times* shame.
Jon and The Watch ally with The Wildings,
Hardhome Massacre, The Dead keep rising,
Jon's like, "Holy shit!" Thorne's like, "Up your's, bro.",
Stabby, stabby, stabby, that's the end of Jon Snow- or is it?
Melisandre playing doctor,
Let's see that ass again... OH GOD! She got hotter,
Bran escapes The Walkers, learns of Jon Snow's Lore,
Thanks to our friend who only lived to hold the door (Hodor!).
Dany and Dothraki, false start but they're back so...
Them, plus a fleet, plus her dragons, Dany's stacked, bro,
Arya ends her training, gets vengeance with a throat slash,
Jon and Sansa reunite, but gotta kill the psychopath.
The biggest f*cking asshole i've ever f*cking seen,
I PUNCH MY TV EVERY TIME HE- oh, i did that already,
Battle of The Bastards, visceral and vicious,
Jon wins, psychopath DIES VIA BITCHES!
King's Landing at The Mercy of Religion,
Young Tommen and Margaery try to reason with them,
Cersei's Trial, wildfire tears through the underground,
Tommen drops out, Queen Cersei Now. Bow down.
We know stuff was left out
Throw us a bone (There's so much crap to know)
But, you're set for the end
Of Game of Thrones
That was Game of Thrones Season 1 through 6, ya'll!
And this is Recap Raps!
Leave a comment below letting us what you want
To see next and we'll see you real soon! Dracarys!