aerosol

My texts to you aren't going through
You're probably somewhere beautiful
I think you'd think about me too
If I was the right beautiful
Should I get stuck spiraling
Over something else
Would the whirlpools get twice as intense
Or suddenly destroy themselves

I don't know shit about the ocean
But I'm learning about bodies
And all the ways they thrash around
And spit you into nothing
I have to keep telling myself
That nobody was trying
To use me up the way I used up spray paint in the alley

But I feel like empty aerosol
Huffed under an overpass
Like I have no solid form
Live my life liquid and gas
I don't know if I've been in love
I've at least dabbled in it
And I think it makes me fully crazy
Not in the good way you talk about it