Good Sign

I'm living with the love of my life
So I'm living with the best distraction
I do my best to a sickening extent
But with every romance I'm still the same person

No one ever really hears me
I love to tell myself these things
No one ever understands me
I love to tell myself these things

But what if all this is a good sign
And when I let go it makes space to try

I've been sifting through my memories
I don't advise it if you wanna look pretty
I've been studying a picture of me at five
Spending thousands of dollars just to get back that light

It'd be easier to blame you
I love to tell myself these things
I'd be easier to love too
I love to tell myself these things

But what if all this is a good sign
And when I let go it makes space to try

When everything falls apart, I will trust it
Kicking and screaming ends up in a silence
Here in the quiet I wake up to more
Looking up at the ceiling and down at the floor

When everything falls apart, I will trust it
Watch as the light shines on all my illusions
Here at the bottom I cannot play god
I am the thing I've been choking on