Distrust (Fear)

[00:21.47] The bed I lay on isn't safe
[00:23.85] My pupils wide, my body aches
[00:26.72] And I can't sleep
[00:31.80] So I draw a bath, three quarters full
[00:34.96] Up to my umbilical
[00:37.51] To find some peace
[00:42.87] Existential what if's'
[00:45.51] Catastrophic ruckus they're on repeat
[00:52.86] Then appeared a mini waterfall
[00:56.18] Tumbling if I recall on top of my feet
[01:05.79] What if the fear that I've always felt
[01:16.47] Stemmed from the sting of a leather belt
[01:27.10] What if the trust that I never held
[01:37.83] Is cause' I placed it in someone else
[01:47.61] What if it doesn't work out
[01:50.11] What if I get hurt when I'm out & about
[01:52.48] These are thoughts that got me spinning around & around
[01:54.90] They're getting louder but I don't hear a sound
[01:58.45] Seems like people trying to get me
[02:00.85] P.O.V my O.C.D is heavy
[02:03.55] Something's got to change before the levee
[02:06.15] Breaks and all my things get messy
[02:08.88] What if I fear them cause' I don't trust me
[02:13.02] I don't trust me
[02:19.63] What if I fear it cause' I don't trust this
[02:23.03] I need to trust this
[02:31.18] What if the things that I can not see
[02:41.83] Are somehow happening all for me
[02:52.40] What if the trust that I now can feel
[03:03.12] Can be the safety so I can heal
[03:14.13] I'm beginning to trust myself
[03:24.88] I'm beginning to trust myself
[03:35.17] Now I'm beginning to trust myself
[03:46.15] I'm beginning to trust myself
[04:07.79] I'm beginning to trust myself
[04:16.23]