And Even If I Did

I didn't shoot anyone
On 5th Avenue
And even if I did
You'd love me
I never hired prostitutes
I'm a germaphobe
And even if I did
You'd clean me
I didn't grab anyone
By the...
And even if I did
You'd want me
All this talk of Moscow
I've no dealing there
And even if I did
It's good business

It's just locker room talk
It's fake news
It's conflicted liberals
Until i say it's not

Oh, I didn't violate
Campaign finance law
And even if I did
You'd elect me
I don't know anything
About wikileaks
And even if I did
No collusion
I didn't try to fire Bob
Mueller the Third
And even if I did
It's not obstruction
I didn't shoot hoops with kitchen roll
In Puerto Rico
And even if I did
Are they American?

It's just locker room talk
It's fake news
Conflicted liberals
Until I say it's not