A lovely cup of tea

England for the English
We all began to yell
And marching with me mates
From the EDL

We're all off to the mosque
Where we'll raise merry hell
But wait a minute lads
What's that delicious smell

Well I was all up for some bigotry
Some prejudice and hatred
But then out came a Muslim
Serving drinks a'caffeinated

It's not English to row
When biscuits have been plated
And now that I think about it
My views might be a bit outdated

The thing that killed
The fascist in me
Was Hassans' homemade biscuits
And a lovely cup of tea

Do you fancy a kickaround my friend
That's what next I heard
Well I was planning on kicking your head Amir
But now that does seem a bit absurd

So out came a football
And outside that mosque was seen
One of the most poignant games of footy
Since Christmas 1914

Well I was all up for a fight
Some (?) protestations
But then a Muslim brought up a football
Well I mean that changed the situation

And Hassan's not a bad player
Surprising for an Asian
The referee's from SrinLanka
And the linesman is Croation

Oh the thing that killed
The fascist in me
Was when Hassan scored the winner
With a brilliant penalty

Love thy neighbour
That's what the Bible said
It probably says something like that in the Quran
I don't know I'm not well read

We were all born to this world
With unconditioned open minds
But it was fear and uncertainty
That caused me to go blind

Now each Sunday
We all come together
And we have biscuits
And we have tea
And we play football for Planet Earth United
Because that's how we all should be

And I think back to that day
That killed the fascist in me
Hassan's homemade biscuits
A game of football
And a lovely cup of tea

But it's got to be British tea mind you
Not that all that chinese tea nonsense
Coming over here to our country
Forcing their foreign tea down our necks
Don't get me started