Poisoning Claude

When you jumped into the lake
I thought I'd made a mistake
In letting you go

But the whole Pacific ocean couldn't drown you
And a thousand men couldn't tame you
And a thousand milligrams of morphine
Wouldn't kill you
You'd have wished you'd never left your room
Knowing damn well you'd fall so soon for a game of kiss and tell
You'd have wished you'd never left your room
Knowing damn well you'd fall so soon for a game of kiss and tell

And when you chopped off your thumb
I had to applaud your gumption
But I could not bring myself to applaud
The time you poisoned Claude
With a dash of this and a dash of that
His head went purple and that was that

My feet are sore I fear I'm just a bore
There are things we'd rather ignore
And things to die for
My feet are sore I fear I'm just a bore
There are things we'd rather ignore
And things to die for

You'd have wished you'd never left your room
Knowing damn well you'd fall so soon for a game of kiss and tell
You'd have wished you'd never left your room
Knowing damn well you'd fall so soon for a game of kiss and tell