new life

It's hard man
So fucking hard

After Jackie and I split up
Jackie, that's my ex
I spent a couple months just drifting
On the awkward couches of friends
And various sad Airbnbs
And lonely cheap hotels

But when I finally got my own place
I thought:
Okay, new space!
New life, new face!
No more time for doom and despair!

I will renew myself now
There is still life within me
There is love within me
If I work on myself now
There will be new love
It's waiting for me somewhere

I will become a better person
I will learn from my mistakes
I will reach out to all my friends
I will take care of myself

I will become a better person
I will learn from my mistakes
I will reach out to all my friends
I will take care of myself

I will make my bed

And I will meet new people
I will be out in the world
I will vibe
I will thrive
I will finally be alive

I will become actualized!
I will finally be my true self!

I will learn
To love new people
And I will learn
How to be loved

But then
But then the lockdown hit
And I was alone
In a new home