It Doesn't Matter to Him

If I think about it, I am successful, as it were.
I get to sing for lovely people all over this lovely world.
And I am nowhere near as awkward as I was when I was younger.
I guess I'm one of those guys who gets better looking as they age.
And though I have been beaten down by constant doubt
The pressure and confusion brought about by people's actions, death, and tax forms
I keep getting up.
And I am loved by all my friends and family
Though, there have been lots of raised eyebrows
Hints, and glances lately.

It doesn't matter to him.
I could be anything
But I could never win his heart again.
It doesn't matter to him.
He took away my AAA pass.
I am invisible to him.

And now I feel the soft, pink flesh of my heart hardening
To the countless possibilities contained within each day.
Vulnerability feels like a cold, wet concrete room lit with fluorescent lights--
Which, as you know, makes everything look bad.
I still keep trying to figure out how I became irrelevant
How I got myself evicted from his heart from one day to the next.
And the worst part is that, even if I got an answer right now
It would not change anything because we have become two strangers.

It doesn't matter to him.
I could be anything
But I could never win his heart again.
It doesn't matter to him.
He took away my AAA pass.
I am invisible to him.