BURNING SKIES

Thunder lightening
Strike me down without trying
I've felt this violence
For far too long I've been fighting it
My head is up against it
I won't experience this
It's a crime to feel like this uh
Thunder violent
Far too long I've been fighting
Got so many emotions
I wanna write down now
But I have no idea how I could capture the inspiration
I wish I could write about good things in life
But the good things don't fill my motivation
As much as the bad things do
And remind me to never forget that I ain't got no limitations
As long as I stand with Christ in this
There is no demon in this that could take my pain and make it desperation
I grab every chance that I got to show Gods name in this wicked place and
I'm so damn proud of my mom
And how she handles the whole family in this very sad situation
It ain't easy for her
I know that her own brother ain't easy on her
And still she stands tall
Cause she carries the strength of the woman who has raised her
I can't imagine what my life without her would've been
It's insane thinking about all these things
It's insane that my last few weeks have been such a mess
And I really fucking hate all the stress that it brings
Losing myself because you're losing you
Losing track of everything that you wanna do
Losing track of your motivation
Inspiration and not doing anything
That you really wanna do
Being stuck in my own head because of all these things
And my own mind
Who will account for these things
I can sit here for hours talking with myself and my doubts
Cause the burning skies are the reason that my feet are still grounded
I just want myself back
How could you just walk out no regrets
God will this ever end
I'm sick of stitching up my own back from the knife that you put in it
I'm sick of believing that you still care because reality will not be different
I'm sick of seeing my mom cry cause there is no way she deserves this life that she's been living
The silence I'm in it
The silence I'm in it
The silence I'm in it
The burning skies remind me where I came from
And who I will become
I've been shot down but I will get up
I'm done just waiting on a miracle
I'll take my life and make something of it
No matter the pain that's been brought upon me
It's weird how life can go
One minute I got everything
And the next I'm all alone
I can't describe what I feel inside
I try to hide
But I just can't do it anymore
It's been enough for me
It's been tough for me
I need to let it go
Wonder why I waited so long with releasing well there's a catch so get ready here we go
Since 23 began I've been in a rollercoaster ride
That doesn't seem to slow down now
I never wanted to stop being me
But being me changed its grounds now
My grandma is in heaven and that hurt me deep down now
But knowing she is okay up there
Is what makes me feel okay
And I need to make her proud now
So I was processing all that but then I lost again
By seeing my family fall apart
And that was something I didn't wanna see coming
I knew it would happen
But I didn't wanna see it
That's just something that is normal to do right
So I kept running kept running kept running kept moving till my breath ran out
I still can't process everything that happened
And yeah I'm broken but don't count me out now
But then I lost my someone .
Who I could always cry to
Who I could always stand with and the person
Who I never had to lie to
One look into her eyes and all my pain would fade away
I know it is better for you this way
But damn I wish we could've stayed
I miss you and I love you
And there's no room in my heart for any hate
I just pray you beat the demons that gave me no option but to wait
So I ended up here alone now
And I can never seem to slow down
I'll take my life and make something of it
No matter the pain that's been brought upon me
I wanna make it right
I've been shot down but I will get up
I'm done just waiting on a miracle
I'll take my life and make something of it
No matter the pain that's been brought upon me
I possess the power to make it right
Send it to my hands whether sick or tired
I won't let the weight of the world retire me
I'm about to breathe
Inhale the essence
Of a life full of lessons
Bow down to my adolescence
I'm strong enough to battle through this
I captured my inspiration and writing this changed me
The burning skies will remind me of all the demons that tried to erase me
One name JESUS
Who is Jesus
I've been down so long which way is up
Falling short feel like I'm out of luck
But then I'm reminded that I've been enough
If not to the world then to God above
No matter what happens He will always bring me home
This world is not a place I'll stay my next message will be to those that remain