Where’s The Bat (Live)

Sittin' on the back porch in the evening
Kids are sleeping, all tucked in tight
Listening to my baby prattling nonstop
Wish he'd just shut up, I could make him and I might
Talking 'bout the day, giving me the what-for
Subjecting to analysis a trip to the store
Why did you forget the cabbage and the beans and
Can you give me money for tomorrow's green beans?

Hot damn it, where is it?
Where's the bat when I need it?
Hot damn it, where is it?
Where's the bat, ooh, when I need it?

I would never do it, no, I'd never do it
But the idea helps me get through it
It's morbid little fun to imagine that head
Louisville slugger that's trapped under the bed

Hot damn it, where is it?
Where's the bat when I need it?
Hot damn it, where is it?
Where's the bat when I need it?

Beautiful thing, privacy of the mind
I think I'm coming across as loving and kind
As a little baby sleeping in the bed
Wish he'd just shut up, I'd like to crack him in the head
Like to crack him in the head

Hot damn it

Well, hot damn it, where is it?
Where's the bat when I need it?
Hot damn it, where is it?
Where's the bat when I need it?