My Own Best Friend

There's only one person who can help you now, Roxie!

There only one person you can count on now, Velma!

And now, Miss Roxie Hart and Miss Velma Kelly sing a song
Of unrelenting determination and unmitigated ego

One thing I know

One thing I know

And I’ve always known

And I've always known

I am my own

I am my own

Best friend

Baby's alive

Baby’s alive

But baby's alone

But baby's alone

And baby's her own

And baby's her own

Best friend
Many's the guy
Who told me he cares
But they were scratchin' my back
'Cause I was scratchin’ theirs

And trusting to luck

And trusting to luck

That’s only for fools

Only for fools

I play in a game

I play in a game

Where I make the rules
And rule number one
From here to the end
Is 'I am my own best friend’

Three musketeers
Who never say die
Are standing here this minute
Me

Me

Myself

Myself

And I!

And I!

If life is a school
I'll pass every test
If life is a game
I'll play it the best
'Cause I won’t give in
And I'll never bend
And I am my own best friend!