Don't Drink and Joust

A part of probation requires I say
to all of you good people here
This story I sing
I did a dumb thing
with a horse, a lance and a beer.

Whatever you do don't drink and joust
just put down that pole no matter how soused.
If you've had too many go home and here's why
The last thing you need is a J-U-I

I only remember the pain in my ass
the feeling that something went wrong
The tower's not nice - I've been there twice
So for you I'm singing this song.

()

So lay down the wood and go sleep it off
Lay down for the night in your bunk
Don't get on that horse who's the squire of course
Friends don't let friends joust drunk.