Tee Shirt Drawer (Album Version) [Album Version]/Album Version
๐ต 2111 characters
โฑ๏ธ 3:06 duration
๐ ID: 26070103
๐ Lyrics
Fashion rule number five
It is okay to wear a T-shirt with nothing written on it
I don't know what it is about rednecks, we never have
To write a resume because you can learn everything
You want to know about us by reading our clothes
You give me a redneck man's T-shirt drawer, I can tell you
What kind of truck he drives, what radio station he listens
To, who he roots for in NASCAR, what he likes to hunt
Who his favorite college football team is, his philosophy
On life, and where he went on vacation the last 21 summers
And you give me his windbreaker, I'll tell
You what kind of cigarettes he smokes
Also with T-shirts guys, if you weigh more than 400 pounds
It's not okay to wear a T-shirt that says "No Fat Chicks."
You ought to be wearing one that says, "I whipped anorexia's ass."
And do not wear an "I'm with stupid" T-shirt if you're by yourself
And if you do, well, I'd say, "That's right."
Fashion rule number six
God invented closed-toed shoes for a reason
Why is it the people with the nastiest feet always wear flip-flops?
You know what I'm talking about?
If you have so many corns you have to put
Up a scarecrow, say no to the flip-flop!
If your toenails are so long you can swoop down on
A lake and catch a trout, say no to the flip-flop!
If you have a toenail that's three different colors and
None of them are nail polish, say no to the flip-flop!
My next fashion rule, and this is for
Some of you younger folks out there
If your mother still drives you to school
You ain't no gangster, pull your pants up
The back pockets of your pants should not be behind your knees
And I don't know why I have to look at the
Underwear of every teenage boy in America
You know, when I was in school, if other people could see
Your underwear, it was because two bullies had cornered
You on the playground and they yanked it up to your neck
Which is why as adults, most men won't even consider wearing a thong
Because those are memories we're trying to repress, you know
And my last fashion rule
Husbands and wives should never dress alike unless you're
Going to a Garth Brooks concert or a Halloween party
It is okay to wear a T-shirt with nothing written on it
I don't know what it is about rednecks, we never have
To write a resume because you can learn everything
You want to know about us by reading our clothes
You give me a redneck man's T-shirt drawer, I can tell you
What kind of truck he drives, what radio station he listens
To, who he roots for in NASCAR, what he likes to hunt
Who his favorite college football team is, his philosophy
On life, and where he went on vacation the last 21 summers
And you give me his windbreaker, I'll tell
You what kind of cigarettes he smokes
Also with T-shirts guys, if you weigh more than 400 pounds
It's not okay to wear a T-shirt that says "No Fat Chicks."
You ought to be wearing one that says, "I whipped anorexia's ass."
And do not wear an "I'm with stupid" T-shirt if you're by yourself
And if you do, well, I'd say, "That's right."
Fashion rule number six
God invented closed-toed shoes for a reason
Why is it the people with the nastiest feet always wear flip-flops?
You know what I'm talking about?
If you have so many corns you have to put
Up a scarecrow, say no to the flip-flop!
If your toenails are so long you can swoop down on
A lake and catch a trout, say no to the flip-flop!
If you have a toenail that's three different colors and
None of them are nail polish, say no to the flip-flop!
My next fashion rule, and this is for
Some of you younger folks out there
If your mother still drives you to school
You ain't no gangster, pull your pants up
The back pockets of your pants should not be behind your knees
And I don't know why I have to look at the
Underwear of every teenage boy in America
You know, when I was in school, if other people could see
Your underwear, it was because two bullies had cornered
You on the playground and they yanked it up to your neck
Which is why as adults, most men won't even consider wearing a thong
Because those are memories we're trying to repress, you know
And my last fashion rule
Husbands and wives should never dress alike unless you're
Going to a Garth Brooks concert or a Halloween party