Oldest Profession

I tried my best as sailor,
A pirate and a thief
But it was not till now
That I know what I should be
I swaggered through the brothel doors and marched straight ahead
When I reached the counter I looked at the girl and said

I wanna to be a trollop a harlot or a whore
I wanna be a Jezebel a flusie and what's more
I was meant to be a strumpet
I am just a tramp at heart
So I am here to be a prostitute a hooker or a tart

Well I guessed it shocked her
She did not know what to say
Then she said that is impossible
It doesn't work that way

I will demonstrate just what I got
Was the pitcher I gave
She nearly had a stroke
But she wasn't quite as brave
She told me that I should talk to all the girl up stairs
There is no approval I could find would mean more then theirs

When I reached the second floor
They pour into the hall
And I said hello lady's
I have something to tell you all

I wanna to be a trollop a harlot or a whore
I wanna be a Jezebel a flusie and what's more
I was meant to be a strumpet
I am just a tramp at heart
So I am here to be a prostitute a hooker or a tart

They laughed and said
There is no way it never has been done
But a girl said let's find out and lead me to door number 1
And 6 hours' later when I left room 24
I know that I had managed to satisfy the floor

They said theirs a girl upstairs for special clientele
For you to have a chance
She's the one to really tell
I climbed the stairs knocked on her door
And said to her hello
Before we start anything there is something you should know

I wanna to be a trollop a harlot or a whore
I wanna be a Jezebel a flusie and what's more
I was meant to be a strumpet
I am just a tramp at heart
So I am here to be a prostitute a hooker or a tart

She said that it was funny and she laughed at my plan
Than told me I could never hack it for I was just a man
So I said "let me prove it and I did like any split[?]
And trust me when I tell you boys I took my time with it
She bended high admitted I was wrong right from the start
Go up and see the madam and you will work here if she is smart
I went to the madam's office and let myself right in
Finely I thought and I said to her with a grin

I wanna to be a trollop a harlot or a whore
I wanna be a Jezebel a flusie and what's more
I was meant to be a strumpet
I am just a tramp at heart
So I am here to be a prostitute a hooker or a tart

I will give you just one chance to prove you aren't out of your head
And I know that I had proved it when she looked at me and said
Ge you found the spot I thought was legend or a myth
You make a perfect case that I find hard to argue with
Women now are working on the ships and docks and shores
And should have the same options as the man who came before
So now I have a job taking care of lady's needs
And all you jealous bastards should came sing along with me

I wanna to be a trollop a harlot or a whore
I wanna be a Jezebel a flusie and what's more
I was meant to be a strumpet
I am just a tramp at heart
So I am here to be a prostitute a hooker or a tart