Porn Wars Deluxe

The reason for this hearing is not to promote any legislation
Indeed, I don't know of any suggestion that any legislation be passed
But to simply provide a forum for airing the issue itself, for
Ventilating the issue, for bringing it out in the public domain
Senator Hollings?
I've had the opportunity to, uh, attend a showing you might
Say, a presentation of, uh, this porn rock as they call it
In the test of pornography, one of the things to look
At is it- it does not have any redeeming social value
Uh, there could an exception here because having attended that pre-
Presentation, the redeeming social value I find that it's inaudible
You- I have a hard time understanding it and, Paul, since
I traveled the country for three years and they said they
Couldn't understand me, maybe I could make a good rock star
I don't know
But in all candor, I would tell you it's- it's outrageous
Filth so I'll be looking from this senator's standpoint
Not just to bring pressures but to try to see if there is
Some constitutional provisions or tax or approach that
Can be used on the Congress to limit this outrageous filth
Bow tie daddy don't you blow your top
Everything's under control
Bow tie daddy don't you blow your top
'Cause you think you're getting too old
Don't try to do no thinking
Just go on with your drinking
Just have your fun you old son of a gun
Then drive home in your Lincoln
What is the reason for these hearings in front of congress?
Sex
Well- Sex
Thank you
I think that statement- Sex
...
Tells the story of this committee
Sex
What is the reason- Sex
...
For these hearings in front of the Congress?
Sex
Sex
Listen you little slut
Listen you little slut
Sex
Fix your gut
Sex
Sex
Sex
I'd be interested to see what toys your kids ever had
Why would you be interested?
Just as a point of interest in this, uh, topic
Well, come on over to the house and I'll show 'em to you
I- I might need that
Now the effects of such lyrics on a well-
Adjusted child may not be cataclysmic
The emotional damage is more subtle
Fire and chains and their objectionable
Tools of gratification in some twisted mind
Now the effects of such lyrics on a well-
Adjusted child may not be cataclysmic
The emotional damage is more subtle
Fire and chains and their objectionable
Tools of gratification in some twisted mind
Now the effects of such lyrics on a well-
Adjusted child may not be cataclysmic
The emotional damage is more subtle
Thank you very much, Mr
Zappa
You understand that, uh, we, as the previous witnesses
Were not asking for legislation and, uh, I don't know
I can't speak for Senator Hollings but I think that the
Prevailing view here is that nobody's asking for legislation
The question is just focusing on what a lot of people
Perceive to be a problem and you've indicated that you
At least understand that there is another point of view
Now the effects of such lyrics on a well-
Adjusted child may not be cataclysmic
The emotional damage is more subtle
If I could find some way Constitutionally to do away with it, I would
Fire and chains and their objectionable
Tools of gratification in some twisted mind
Now the effects of such lyrics on a well-
Adjusted child may not be cataclysmic
The emotional damage is more subtle
Fire and chains and their objectionable
Tools of gratification in some twisted mind
Thank you very much, Mr
Chairman
I found your statement very interesting
And, uh, let me say although I disagree with some of the statements
That you make and have made on other occasions, I have been a
Fan of your music believe it or not and I- I, uh, respect you as
A true original and- and a tremendously talented- t- t- musician
Wait a minute
I was surprised Senator Gore knew and liked your music
Uh, I must, uh, confess that I never
Heard any of your music to my knowledge
I would be more than happy to recite my lyrics to you
It can't happen here
It can't happen here
I'm telling you, my dear
That it can't happen here
Because I've been checking it out, baby
I checked it out a couple of times
And I'm telling you it can't happen here
Oh, darling, it's important that you believe me
That it can't happen here
Who could imagine that they would freak out somewhere in Kansas?
Kansas
Who could imagine that they would freak out in Minnesota?...
That they would freak out in Washington, DC
Can we forego that?
You- you- you've probably never heard of The Mothers Of Invention
I have heard, uh, of, uh, Glenn Miller and Mitch Miller
Did you ever perform with them?
They don't even understand their own music
Course, nobody does but them
They don't, they don't even know what they're doing
No
I've- I've seen 'em a couple times
D- did you see their uniforms?
Unbelievable!
Which ones?
The, the red ones?
All those rhinestones all over their wings and things like that
Do you know what I would- The gold lamé hoof covers?
Unbelievable
Maybe I could make as a rock- Maybe I could make as a rockstar
I don't know...
As a drive my love inside you
Maybe I could make as a rock- Maybe I could make as a rockstar
I don't know...
As a drive my love inside you
Maybe I could make as a rock- Maybe I could make as a rockstar
I don't know...
As a drive my love inside you
Maybe I could make as a rock- Maybe I could make as a rockstar
I don't know...
As a drive my love inside you
Maybe I could make as a rock- It's outrageous filth
Maybe I could make as a rock- It's outrageous filth
Come with Daddy
Come with Daddy
It's outrageuous filth Maybe I could make as a rock- Come with Daddy
It's outrageous filth ...
Star
I don't know
Maybe I could make as a rock- Come
With Daddy It's outrageous filth ...
Star
Maybe I could make as a rock- I don'
T maybe I should make a good rockstar
I dunno
Maybe I can make as a rock- rockstar
Come with daddy Star I don't know come with daddy May- may- maybe
I can makeas a rockstar I don't know come with dad come with daddy
Maybe maybemaybe I could makeas a rockstar I don't know
Sorry your time has expired A world of secret hungers
Perverting the men who made call us
Every desire is hidden away in a drawer in a desk by a Naugahyde
Chair on a rug where they walk and
Droop past the girls in the office
Rock porn Rock por- Rock por- Rock for free willy nilly all day long
And I think your suggestion is a
Good one that they print those words
That would go a long way into satisfying everyone's objections
I- All we have to do is find out how it will be paid for
Pyromania no question Burned buildiungs burned burned
Burned This hearing led to trials and censorship
If I could find some way constitutionally to do away with it
I would constrictions of free speech willy nilly all day long The
Issue is too hot not cool down Well I'll be looking from this
Senator's standpoint and not just bring pressure but try see if
There is some constitutional provision packed or approached that
Can be used under congress to limit this outrageous film Yeah We'll
Get back to the WIMP and his low budget conception of personal
Freedom in just a moment but first
Welcome to What The Fuck Going On Here?
A celebration of the American way of life
I noticed on the, uh media yesterday
Morning something about a tax bill
I've looked into that That does not pertain to this particular
Hearing but we do know that, uh the matter of the broadcast
Airwaves er gives more or less the most limited protected
Speech because the airways do belong to the American public
They invade the privacy of homes and we do know under the law
Of pornography that children are given a special protection
I want everyone to know I'm keeping this foremost in mind and asking
The best of constitutional minds if there's someway in the world
To try and limit it as we go along with the voluntary labeling
I commend those who are now beginning to label
That's what we'd like to have truth in labeling
I don't think we can outlaw pornography, don't have that in mind at
All but to take six to seven hours that's the average listening
Time senato- as I understand by the youngsters of this particular
Rock porn and- and- and rock music and everything else of that kind
Or let's say rock music an intersperse it with pornography i- isn't...
Is a matter of national concern und ah is something
That we've got to give some kind of attention
To within the constrictions of free speech
So I'll being looking fromthis senators' standpoint Not just tobring
Pressures But totry toseeifthereis
Someconstitutionalprovisionsattaxed
Or an approach that can be used under Congress to limit this
Outrageous filth All your children are poor unfortunate victims
Of systems beyond their controlA plague upon your ignorance To the
Great despairOf your ugly life Where did Annie goWhen she wentto
TownWho are allThose creepsThat she brings around Senator Tribble?
I believe this may well be the most important hearing conducted by
The Commerce Committee this yearI look forward to working with you
And my colleagues on this committee, the parents, Music Resource
Center, the recording and broadcast industries, and responsible
Citizens everywhere to combat, to respond to this very real problem
All your children are poor unfortunate victims of lies you believe
A plague upon your ignorance that keeps
The young from the truth they deserve
Senator Gore?
Thank you very much, uh, Mr
Chairman, and I would like to thank you
And commend you for calling this hearing
Because my wife has been heavily involved in the evolution of
This issue, I have gained quite a bit of familiarity with it
And I've really gained an education in what is involved
Uh, I am...
I was interested when the hearing wa- uh, was first announced
To have the opportunity to ask, uh, the heads of the record
Companies so whether or not they felt some responsibility
Uh, I am told by staff that every single one of the chief executive
Officers invited to participate chose
Uh, to decline that invitation
I, I fully understand that, but I wanted
To note that fact for the record
And, and I think that they should take a look at what their
Companies are doing, and just ask themselves as human beings whether
Or not this is the way they want to, uh, spend their lives, if
This is the way they want to earn a living, if this is the kind of
Contribution they wanna make to the society in, in which we live
No one's proposing or contemplating the
Government answering that question for them
Well, I think these hearings, uh, should not have been held if
We're not considering legislation or regulations at this time
I emphasized earlier that they might follow
I simply wanted to say to you that I suspect that unless
The industry, quote, cleans up their act, and I use that
End quote word again, uh, there's likely to be legislation
And it seems to me that it would not be too far removed from
Reality or too offensive to anyone if you could follow the
General guidelines, uh, right, wrong, or indifferent that
Uh, are now in place with regard to the movie industry
Be perfectly candid with you
I would look for regulations, uh, some kind of, uh, legislation
If it could be constitutionally accomplished, unless of
Course we have these initiatives from the industry itself
What will you do when the label comes up?
And the plastic's all melted and the chrome is too soft?
Who are the brain police?
Senator Hawkins, delighted to have you here
I commend you, Mr
Chairman, and the committee for holding this all-important hearing
As Chairman of the Children, Family, Drug, and Alcoholism
Subcommittee, this is a subject that I am very familiar with
Much has changed since Elvis's seemingly innocent times
Subtlety, suggestions, and innuendo have given way to
Overt expressions and descriptions of often violent
Sexual acts, drug-taking, and flirtations with the occult
The record album covers to me are self-
Explanatory, and I'd like to show just a sampling
When do we?
Porn rock
Porn rock
I...
It's My Life and I Love Sex
With obviously a lot of fire and chains and other
Objectionable tools of gratification in some twisted minds
There is no question about the message, and I still hear art is art
And in America artists are supposed to be free to express themselves
And who has the responsibility to answer that question?
Parents?
The music industry?
The government?
I speak as a legislator, I speak as a parent, a veteran
Who has brought up three children through adolescence
I know the temptations dangled in front of teenagers and
I know the frusta- frustrations parents, uh, experience
All through this process, the sense of hopelessness
When you get the feeling your child won't listen to you
There is, in these times, often a need to
Look to a force outside yourself for help
The question we must ask is, should the force be the government?
And that's what this hearing is designed to determine
I believe it will be he- helpful before we proceed any further
Uh, to get an idea of what it is we're, uh, talking about
One criticism of the rock industry is the way it
Portrays values in rock videos which are viewed by
The kids while we're all busy here being legislators
There are suggestions that the move to label
Rock albums be extended to videos as well
I don't watch much television
I'm not sure how many of my colleagues get much opportunity to watch
Any of the music video shows now available on cable and free TV
I brought along two videos from which to choose, which I believe
Are representative of the kind of presentation which have caused
The furor.What's the thing that they's talkin' about everywhere?
Sex
When they wanna be suave and debonair
Sex
What's poppin' up the most from coast to coast?
Sex
Had your bongo party and your weenie roast
Sex
Do ya do or don't ya don't?
Sex
Bet ya lyin' if ya say ya won't
Some girls try it and go on a diet
Then they worry 'cause they's too fat
Who wants to ride on an ironing board?
That ain't no fun
I tried me one
Roll that meat all over your bones
Work the wall with the local Jones
And while you do it, remember this line
The sniffer says it all the time
The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin'
Hey
The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin'
Hey
The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin'
Hey
The bigger the cushion
Hey
Makes no difference if you're young or old
Sex
Don't you act like it's made of gold
Sex
Ladies, they need it just like the guys
Sex
Maybe you could use a protein surprise
Sex
Any time, anywhere
Sex
Why do you think it's growin' there?
Some girls try it and they don't like it
They complain 'cause it don't last
Who wants to ride on a debutante?
It talks too much
It moves too fast
Watch the scenery while you ride
You can be very warm inside
And when the train goes round the bend
Check the shrubbery on the other end
The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin'
Hey
The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin'
Hey
The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin'
Hey
The bigger the cushion
Hey
That video- That video is called- No
Wait, no wait a second, Senator Hawkins
Just a minute
You know, this is a very, uh, large crowd today
We have allowed people in beyond the capacity of this room
We're not gonna have any demonstrations
No applause
Who are you?
No demonstrations of any kind
I see some a y'all be frownin' 'cause maybe
You think what I's tellin' you is a lie
Am I right?
Let's just have a test
How many you nice folk think I knows what I's talkin' bout?
Raise your hand up
Uh-huh
And how many thinks my potato been bakin' too long?
Raise your miserable hand up
Uh-huh
Now, how many of you folks is convinced the government
Be totally unconcerned with the blue liberation of
Undesirable tenants in their condominium or life?
And how many folks believe their number won't come up
Next time the breeze blow from the easterly direction?
Let's face it, peoples
Ugly as I might be, I am your future
Ain't that right, Sister Abdullah?
Mm-hmm
Oh, oh yeah
That's right
Senator Gordon?
Mr
Zappa, I am astounded at the, uh, courtesy and soft-moist, uh
Nature of the comments of my friend, the senator from Tennessee
I can only say that I found your statement to be boorish, uh
Incredibly and uh, insensitively insulting to the people who were
Here previously that you could manage to give the First Amendment
Of the Constitution of the United States a bad name if I felt
That you had the slightest understanding of it, which I do not
Don't have the slightest understanding of the difference
Between government action and private action
And that you have certainly destroyed any case
You might otherwise have had with this senator
We see in the back of the city hall light
The dream of a girl about 13
Off with her clothes and into a bed
Where she tickles his fancy all night long
Mr
Zappa, thank you very much for your testimony
Thank you
Next witness is John Denver
We haven't gotten much from this one there
He's got the bear by the tail there, huh?
See?
I'm out at last
Boy, the world sure looks different
Wow, there's hardly anything fun to do since they made music illegal
But I'm hooked
I got to have it
I've got to have it
I need to play
But there's no musicians anymore
They're all gone
Wait
I've got it
I'll be sullen and withdrawn
I'll mingle off into the twilight realm of my own secret thoughts
I'll walk through the parking lot in a semi-catatonic state
And dream of guitar notes to go with the loading zone announcement