Stephon The Alternative Lifestyle Reindeer

Rumors emanating from the North to all the poles
Outsiders speculating who's designing Santa's clothes
He's the newest face in Christmas, and soon the world will know
That Rudolph's nose is not the only reindeer appendage that glows

Stefan, the alternative lifestyle reindeer
Heaven help Santa should he call him queer
He's standing tall against the wall of prejudice and fear
He's Stefan, the alternative lifestyle reindeer

Well, he came out of the forest and that's why he's on the news
And ever since that legislation changed
Now they can't make poor Stefan join
In all those stupid reindeer games

He's Stefan, the alternative lifestyle reindeer
Heaven help Santa should he call him queer
Prancer up in front of him, he's got Blitzen to the rear
He's Stefan, the alternative lifestyle reindeer

He's embarrassed by his antlers, he retains progesterone
And in his mind he looks like Doris Day
And if the health plan springs for surgery
Someday you know he really may

He's Stefan, the alternative lifestyle reindeer
Heaven help Santa should he call him queer
He's standing tall against the wall of prejudice and fear
He's Stefan, the alternative lifestyle reindeer

Affirmative reaction, the world is on its ear
Hey, that speech that Jesse Jackson
Made brought Rush Limbaugh to tears
And he'll go down in history for months or even years
He's Stefan (Stefan) the alternative lifestyle reindeer