Self-Surgery

Who or what is any of this for?
An empty theatre
Staring at myself
Maybe I've had too much time to think
Desperate to move on
Before I count to one

I draw a line here and now
From my sternum to my gut
Nothing to numb, nothing to take for the pain
Draining the puss
Breaking the surface again
I push myself under
Clean my wounds

With both eyes on the horizon
I've got one foot in the grave
Before I know it I'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead, Dead, Dead
I can't be scared of living anymore

I don't know what I'm searching for
Foreign bodies
Scared of what I'll find
Things better left unsaid
Imprisoned in skin
In the safety of familiar cells

Acclimatised to life on the inside
Psychosomatic, self inflicted
Why bother?
Let myself slip away

It got the best of me
Well what did that leave?
Morbid curiosity compelling me to breathe
To breathe
To breathe
A whole year cooking in my own juices
Self awareness becomes self obsession
Self surgery, where will it leave me?
Are we healing or just rotting from the inside?
My brain's in a blender
Flesh barely holding on
I'm bursting at the seams
I can't hold it in anymore

With both eyes on the horizon
I've got one foot in the grave
Before I know it I'll be dead
I can't be scared of living anymore

Things are always clearer when you take another look
Life has left a back door open
Giving you a second glance