Arose

[00:04.95] If I could rewind time like a tape
[00:07.75] Inside a boombox
[00:09.00] One day for every pill
[00:10.76] Or percocet that I ate
[00:13.00] Cut down on the valium
[00:15.09] I'd a heard everything
[00:16.36] But death is turning so definite, wait
[00:19.18] They got me all hooked up to some machine
[00:22.27] I love you, Bean
[00:23.32] Didn't want you to know I was struggling
[00:25.32] Feels like I'm underwater
[00:26.87] Submerged like a submarine
[00:28.46] Just heard that nurse say
[00:29.44] My liver and kidneys aren't functioning
[00:31.66] Been flirtatious with death
[00:33.11] Skirt-chasing, I guess
[00:34.46] It's arrivederci
[00:35.79] Same nurse, just heard say
[00:36.87] They're unplugging me
[00:37.95] And it's your birthday
[00:39.73] Jade, I'm missing your birthday
[00:41.54] Baby girl, I'm sorry
[00:42.90] I fucking hate when you hurt, Hai
[00:45.08] And sweeties, thank you for waiting to open gifts
[00:47.44] But, girls, you can just open 'em
[00:49.29] Dad ain't making it home for Christmas
[00:51.63] Wish I had the strength to just blow a kiss
[00:54.18] I go to make a fist
[00:55.31] But I can't make one, I'm frozen stiff
[00:57.26] I yell, but nothing comes out
[00:59.05] I'm crying inside, I shout
[01:00.46] My vocal cords won't permit me
[01:02.22] I scream, but it's not allowed
[01:04.25] You put your arm around Momma to calm her, wow!
[01:06.83] I just thought about the aisle
[01:08.33] I'll never get to walk us down
[01:10.54] Never see you
[01:11.40] Graduate in your caps and gowns
[01:13.50] It's 'bout to be 2008
[01:15.31] How's this happening now?
[01:16.83] I've got so much more to do
[01:18.63] And Proof, I'm truly sorry
[01:20.29] If I let you down, but this tore me in two
[01:23.48] The thought of no more me and you
[01:25.67] You gave me shoes, Nikes like new
[01:27.95] For me for school
[01:29.70] Doody, I'm trying, but you
[01:31.43] You were the glue that binded
[01:33.14] So many things, time
[01:34.46] I'd give anything to rewind it
[01:36.39] I had to walk down my halls
[01:37.78] And constantly be reminded
[01:39.40] By pictures all on my walls
[01:41.29] And I couldn't sleep at night 'cause
[01:42.66] That image burned in my brain
[01:44.24] Of you on the table
[01:45.19] Me falling across your body
[01:46.79] Not able to stand to save you
[01:48.83] God, why did you take him?
[01:50.90] I'm tryna keep his legacy alive
[01:53.16] But I'm dying, where's Nathan?
[01:54.89] Little ladies, be brave
[01:56.37] Take care of your mother
[01:57.89] Smile pretty for pictures
[01:59.44] Always cherish each other
[02:01.10] I'll always love ya
[02:02.01] And I'll be in the back of your memory
[02:04.09] And I know you'll never forget me
[02:05.71] Just don't get sad when remembering
[02:07.72] And, little bro, keep making me proud
[02:10.00] You better marry that girl
[02:11.83] 'Cause she's faithfully down
[02:13.75] And when you're exchanging those sacred vows
[02:15.41] Just know that if I could be there, I would
[02:17.62] And should you ever see parenthood
[02:19.43] I know you'll be good at it
[02:21.15] Oh, almost forgot to do something
[02:22.93] Thank my father too
[02:24.26] I actually learnt a lot from you
[02:26.10] You taught me what not to do
[02:28.50] And Mom, wish I'd have had the chance
[02:30.35] To have one last heart-to-heart
[02:31.98] Honest and open talk with you
[02:34.29] Doody, I see you
[02:35.65] I go to walk to you
[02:36.84] And I can feel my soul leave my body
[02:38.74] And float across the room
[02:40.34] Nurses lean over the bed
[02:42.15] Pulling tubes out
[02:43.48] Then the sheet over my head
[02:45.24] Shut the room down
[02:46.61] Girls, please don't get upset
[02:48.47] I see those cheeks soaking and wet
[02:50.02] As you squeeze hold of my neck
[02:51.62] So forcibly, don't wanna let
[02:53.54] Me go, pillow drenched
[02:55.06] Emotional wrecks
[02:56.57] With every second
[02:57.79] Each closer to death
[02:59.28] But suddenly, I feel my heart
[03:01.32] Begin to beat slow, then a breath
[03:03.12] Machines go (Beep, beep, beep)
[03:04.88] Must've guessed the cheat codes to this shit
[03:07.28] I'm tryna rewind time like a tape
[03:09.60] Find an escape
[03:10.80] Make a beeline
[03:11.76] Try and awake
[03:13.33] From this dream, I need to re-find
[03:15.06] My inner strength
[03:16.22] To remind me
[03:17.55] Even if a steep climb I must take
[03:19.35] To rewrite a mistake
[03:21.08] I'm rewinding the tape
[03:25.37] (I don't want it)
[03:26.86] I'll put out this last album, then I'm done with it
[03:29.07] One hundred percent finished, fed up with it
[03:31.16] I'm hanging it up, fuck it
[03:32.82] Excuse the cursing, baby, but just know
[03:35.01] That I'm a good person, though they portray me as cold
[03:37.95] And if things should worsen, but I bet you they won't
[03:40.74] I'm pledging to throw this methadone in the toilet
[03:43.08] Shred these old letters I wrote
[03:44.75] All that old pathetic loathing, closing credits can roll
[03:47.29] I'm proud to be back
[03:49.12] I'm 'bout to, like a rematch
[03:51.08] Outdo Relapse
[03:52.43] With Recovery, Mathers LP2
[03:54.58] Help propel me to
[03:56.15] Victory laps
[03:57.33] Gas toward them and fast forward the past
[03:59.57] Consider the last four minutes as
[04:01.47] That's the song I'd have sang to my daughters
[04:03.45] If I'd have made it to the hospital
[04:04.56] Less than two hours later, but I fought it
[04:06.86] Came back like a boomerang on 'em
[04:08.75] Now a new day is dawning
[04:10.16] I'm up, Tuesday, it's morning
[04:11.62] Now I know
[04:12.07]