Interlude I: Milk

Long after that boy
Who brought the world joy
There arose the tale of Saint Nick
With a "ho ho ho"
And an affinity for snow
He became famous for handing out gifts
Year after year
The children declare
The praises of Santa each season
While fathers and mothers
Fuss with each other
Over vague instructions and missing pieces
Why does ole Nicholas
Getting cookies and milk from us
Get all the focus each year?
Does he even know how
To dress up a doll?
Has he ever stuffed one teddy bear?
Let's all be certain
Santa ain't the person
Who's makin' all those presents happen
The elves are the reason
For the Christmas toy season
Are they even paid for their tinkerin' and tappin'?
All the screws and the bolts
The trains and the boats
The child-sized electrical ovens
It really must irk
Those elves doing work
While Santa gets all the lovin'
Workers rights gone wrong
Where is the song
For this nimble North-Polian crew?
Trapped in a matrix
With candy for paychecks
And wearing those curly-toed shoes
(Yeah, why they gotta wear those curly shoes?)
Little girls and boys
All over the world
It's time to know the truth
And for all them elves
Sitting on them shelves
Well
This here is a song for you
This is "The Elf Song"
It's about elves