Opening Band

We are the opening band
We are here to do five or six or seven songs
Don't go too long, and get the hell off the stage
We are the opening band
We're probably not the band you came to see tonight
But it's alright
'Cause soon we'll go away
And we're wondering just where the hell's the sound guy
He disappeared just after we got up here
He's probably behind the building
Rolling up a fatty and he'll be gone
Until our last song
We got a VW van
I had to sell every Star Wars figure that I had
And ask my dad to co-sign for the loan
We don't got a whole lot of fans
Nobody asks for autograph and sad to say
As of today
No panties have been thrown
And we're wondering if this was worth the drive here
We spent 6 hours in traffic on the highway
For 50 bucks and half-price on the cheese fries
And free Miller Lite on tap
Who can drink that crap
My cousin lives in town and we'll be crashing at his place
Unless his girlfriend's home from college
And she's staying for the weekend
And if she is then we will have to go and park the van
Behind the IHOP by the turnpike
And we'll sleep in the backseat
And we're wondering just where the headline act is
They're probably getting wasted in the green room
And they don't give a rat's ass who we are
So when they start to play up here
We're gonna drink all their beer
We are the opening band
We hope that all of you sign up on our mailing list
And buy our disc
And T-Shirts in black and gray
We are the opening band
And we only got about 25 more minutes left
That's all we get
To blow your ass away
We are the opening band
We are the opening band
Hello
Hello
Hello